Monday, February 21, 2005

Where does adultery begins?

"Do you not understand that whatever enters the mouth goes into the stomach and is eliminated? But those things which proceed out of the mouth come from the heart, and they defile a man. For out of the heart proceed evil thoughts, murders, adulteries, fornications, thefts, false witness, blasphemies. These are the things which defile a man, but to eat with unwashed hands does not defile a man." Matthew 15:17-20

Adultery, like sex, is beginning to lose its meaning, opting for a more literal sense of the word. Sex, is regarded as a fun activity, something for any man or woman in love (even love now has many meanings) or even not in love but are fond of each other's looks/physical attributes. It's pleasurable, in the case of some women, validation (as i've learnt from watching Sex & the City, something of it that i will post both here and skitzels). Sex can be communication, speaking of adoration or love. But mostly, sex is the course of action by which a man inserts his penis into a woman's vagina.

Matthew 19:9 quotes Jesus saying, "And i say to you, whoever divorces his wife, except for sexuals immorality, and marries another, commits adultery; and whoever marries her who is divorced commits adultery."

When does adultery occurs in the definition of our society?

I have read in some blogs of experiences of being cheated, the various circumstances in which they tell of it. Some consider fondling, the holding of hands to be a form of adultery. Some say not until they have sex. One particularly dubious one, when i asked him if he considered oral sex with a married woman to be adulterous, was that he said, no. And after that, i asked him if your wife had oral sex with another man then, he answered "YES".

There were some who said that if they lied to them and went to see another woman, it was adulterous behavious. Those reactions above are mainly by women, unless noted otherwise. When i asked some guys, it was ever only about physical confrontation. They can give group hugs, not one-on-one hugs, look eye-to-eye but not touch. No fondling. No sex. But they wanna have physical confrontation with others, wishing for women to be ultra tolerant.

And i read with dismay, how certain couples resort to using fantasizing other people to enhance the 'effect' of their sex lives. How during sex with her partner, that a woman would dream about another guy doing his thing with her and vice versa. How much of this action constitute adultery? (many sex therapists actually encourage this, bothers me to no ends)

Pornography. I've read many a times in CLEO mag (reading off my gf's mags) about confused women who write in to tell that they found their boyfriends or husbands watching porn, having porn, or downloading porn, stacking porn mags somewhere safe and etc. But they cannot decide for sure, where does the adultery begin?

Quoting from healthynewage:

"For the male, desire and arousal may begin by just the sight of a beautiful woman. As any man can tell you, love at first sight can happen - men respond incredibly to visual stimuli."

It happens. I believe it happens all the time, to both man and woman. We are sub-consciously eternal sinners, and consciously tempted every second of our life. But God has this to say to us:

With men, this is impossible, but with God all things are possible.

The answer to the question posed in the topic lies in Matthew 5:27-32 which reads:

27 "You have heard that it was said to those of old, 'You shall not commit adultery.'
28 "But i say to you that whoever looks at a woman to lust for her has already commited adultery with her in his heart.
29 "If your right eye causes you to sin, pluck it out and cast it from you; for it is more profitable for you that one of your members perish, than for your whole body to be cast into hell.
30 "And if your right hand causes you to sin, cut it off and cast it from you; for it is more profitable for you that one of your members perish, than for your whole body to be cast into hell.
31 "Furthermore it has been said, "Whoever divorces his wife, let him give her a certificate of divorce.'
32 "But i say to you that whoever divorces his wife for any reason except sexual immorality causes her to commit adultery; and whoever marries a woman who is divorced commits adultery."

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